Football managers are like whingeing, whining school kids… only older, more experienced and - apart from Gordon Strachan – bigger. When their team loses, they come out with all sorts of childish arguments about why it’s all so unfair: ‘If he hadn’t dived’, ‘If he had been sent off’, ‘He was kicking the ball back to his goalie to take a free kick’.
Maybe it’s the pressure on managers to justify defeats to their ‘quick to fire’ chairmen. Or that the rise in media coverage of bad tackles, diving and goal-line technology has given them the ammo to defend indefensible displays.
The players are just as bad. This week it was the turn of Birmingham’s Richard Johnson to go on Sky’s Goals on Sunday to point out, unchallenged, that Chamakh “dived”… despite the video replay showing he hadn’t.
So what would our league position look like right now if all the so-called ‘injustices’ pointed out by rival managers this season were actually punished? Well, I’ll tell you:
Liverpool away
Official result: drew 1-1
Hodgson: "It's a disappointment to get this close to the end of the game and not get three points. But I think a point is about right."
Opposition manager’s verdict: fair result.
Blackpool home
Official result: won 6-0
Holloway: “We were doing OK until the referee deemed Ian's challenge to be a sending off. I thought it was a penalty at best but then to send him off ridiculous - it absolutely ruined the game as spectacle.”
Opposition manager’s verdict: should have been a draw.
Blackburn away
Official result: won 2-1
Allardyce: "I'm disappointed we didn't get something out of the game and from my point of view the first half was our opportunity to get our noses in front. Because we didn't take those opportunities we paid the price for that.”
Opposition manager’s verdict: should have been a draw.
Bolton home
Official result: won 4-1
Coyle: "Everyone who watched that game will know what happened at 2-1. We should have had a free-kick for Lee on the edge of the box. One of the biggest free-kicks you will ever see in your life. And the ref doesn't give it. Then Cahill comes in the back of Chamakh and fouls him, and it was a foul. But my initial reaction was it was a yellow, and not a red. But he [referee Simon Attwell] sends him off, and that changes the game. In two seconds, it changes the course of the game.
Opposition manager’s verdict: should have been a draw.
Sunderland away
Official result: drew 1-1
Bruce: "We worked extremely hard. They got a fluke of a goal but I thought our first-half performance was excellent and we've got our reward."
Opposition manager’s verdict: fair result.
West Brom home
Official result: lost 2-3
Di Matteo: "I would say we deserved it, the way we played, the way we created chances, scored goals and played very well.
Opposition manager’s verdict: fair result.
Chelsea away
Official result: lost 0-2
Wilkins: “All in all I thought it was a fantastic performance.”
Opposition assistant manager’s verdict: fair result.
Birmingham home
Official result: won 2-1
McLeish: The penalty changed the game. If we had gone on and scored the next goal it would have been over. I think we were comfortable. The tackle by Nasri is a sending-off. Eboue had the scissor challenge on Ridgewell. We know the damage it can do. Did you see Murphy get punched in the face in the last minute? He’s got stitches. Let’s investigate. Jack Wilshere’s was a deserved red. Arsenal should have finished with seven men.
Opposition manager’s verdict: Birmingham should have won.
So, there you have it. Our true league position is 20th. Yep, bottom, with a total of five points. Ian Holloway did later say that his team probably would have lost anyway, yet even that generosity gives us just seven points – 17th in the league.
Isn’t it a shame league tables don't take excuses into account?
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